“Oh I will save that outfit for when I lose 10 pounds”
“Oh when I get a spray tan then I will wear the tank top that shows more skin”
“Oh I want to wear a dress to this occasion, but I think it might be too much”
“Will they think I’m trying too hard if I put on a lot of make up?”
“I didn’t have time to shower after the gym and I look sweaty… should I still go for dinner with friends?”
“oh I’m going to untag myself from this picture because I don’t like the way I look”.
Yup. I have been there. I started to wonder why it is almost more “normal” to hate/talk shit about our bodies than it is to compliment them? I mean, hang out with a bunch of females and I can guarantee at least one of them will comment on how much they hate something about themselves. In contrary, if anyone comments on how much they love certain things about themselves – we immediately think wow she’s so full of herself. Unsure where this toxic cycle started, but I feel like it needs to end.
I’ve for sure found myself stuck in this toxic cycle before & I had to really ponder why I cared so much? Why I put so much emphasis on feeling like crap? What even was I striving for?
If we’re striving to look perfect. It’s never going to happen. We will never be able to look perfect because as a society our standards are not only too high, but actually physically impossible. Filters, injections & plastic surgeries create an impossible standard to live up to. What we are searching for doesn’t even exist.
A couple summers back I made a rule for myself. I would only speak to myself like I was speaking to a friend. So, that meant I was going to do everything possible to stop negative thoughts about myself or saying negative things about myself.
I still struggle with body image days- Especially when someone points out the scars I have on my body from a keloid disorder, or the fact that I am quite naturally muscular, so my clothes don’t always fit the same way they would a 6 foot tall skinny model. So of course I still wrestle with negative thoughts in mind, but the difference is a refuse to hold on them.
So, now that its summer, you might be presented with the opportunity to go swimming or out for drinks with your friends and I encourage you to not only wear the damn outfit regardless of how you feel, but stop thinking your self worth is centered on your physical appearance. You have so much to offer that has nothing to do with your physical appearance.
Nobody is promised tomorrow. And I can tell you there’s no way I’d want to spend the last day of my life missing out or feeling bad – only because I didn’t think I was “pretty enough or skinny enough”. And that’s on living life to the fullest.